Tuesday, June 3, 2008

A Sad Day

Let me start off by saying that things have been as busy as ever in my house. With the approach of summer and the end of the school season, it has been insane. But the insanity became craziness and sadness last Wednesday.

I mentioned in a earlier posting that at one time we did have guardianship of 3 nieces. And that back in February we had to let one of the girls go because of her behavior. Thinking that we were doing the right thing, we sent her to live with her mother. But, when we went to court to terminate our guardianship, the judge reprimanded us for doing so. The judge then made her a ward of the state and said she was to be sent to the foster care system. They handed us some paperwork and told us to take it and deliver the papers to juvenille hall. So, I followed through, and was told that we no longer had to do anything, that they would pick her up and do the rest. Well that was back in April. And she was never picked up. She continued to live with her mother. Until we received a phone call last Wednesday telling us that we had to deliver her to the foster care system before Monday.

Now mind you, she was living almost four hours from us. So, we had to take our only day off this week to drive up to her and bring her back. The drive was nice but long. I was not at all happy when we showed up at the intake center only to be told that they could not help us that night. And at 1 a.m. the last thing you want to hear after a 8 hour trip is, we can't help you tonight. So, another 20 minutes later we get home only to go straight to bed. On Saturday we were told we had the wrong paperwork. We had to wait until Monday before we could get everything straightened out. It only took almost 2 hours on the phone but we got it taken care of. The only thing left to do was complete the delivery of my niece.

When we arrived at the intake center, we had to wait for what seemed like ever to speak to the case worker. And for the life of me I can not figure out why my niece was happy bout being there. I could see the hurt in my husands eyes. He did not want to let her go. But we had to. I know how hard his mother fought when she was alive to keep her grandchildren out of foster care. So, that made it even harder for us to leave her behind. We just wanted to save her. But, we had to come to the understanding that she needs to learn the hard way, that life in the system is not easy.

We will miss her. And I know her siblings miss her. And I do hope that one day we will be able to bring her out of there. But for now we must maintain our lives as is.....missing a child. And for now I just want to be sad.


Kookaburra said...

Children do not "need to learn the hard way" as you put it. I think that is horrid that anyone would ever give up on a child. Children with no home (or love) of their own, do not just get better. They need the constant love and support of their family.

crazynlovemom said...

I am so sorry that you do not understand what led to our giving up guardianship. We had to make the decision that was right for the entire family, not just one person.




MARC @ http://chuckysblogspot2.blogspot.com/

Peggy said...

hi,that was a heartbreaking decision to make.We never know if the decisions we make are right or wrong, we can only go with what we know at the time. Hindsight is 20/20 vision the rest of the time we are in the dark.